You know that the recession is really pouring down hard when you have listings for offers like this. A Craiglist poster in Vancouver is offering Tetris lessons for an "affordable price." Apparently, Tetris is so complex that you actually need to pay for lessons.
For US 30, you get 90 minutes of Tetris Fundamentals, which include (as posted on CraigList):
- the ability to identify and maneuver all 7 Tetriminoes, as well as their major uses
- an understanding of how to achieve back to back Tetrises
- learned to optimize your use of basic features and techniques such as hard drops and wall kicks, as well as making the most out of holds and block preview (these features may not be native to all versions of Tetris)
- watched me play Tetris for 45 minutes
- gained the confidence to play Tetris by yourself or against friends, strangers, and family members
So for the 90 minutes you pay 30 bucks for, you spend half of it watching him play. Then you gain more confidence in your Tetris game, so you can pit yourself against other players. facepalm
That's not all! For US 40 - 55, you get 2 hours of Intermediate Tetris. Yes, there's an intermediate level, and I didn't even know that. Maybe I should give this guy a call.
- This training program is slightly longer in duration, and incorporates all of the modules covered in Tetris Fundamentals but also includes beer, wine or liquor. You will challenge yourself by applying the skills you ve learned while growing increasingly intoxicated and playing against someone who is similarly drunk
- There may be a short primer on computational geometry and algorithmic complexity theory, unless we run out of time
I'm still laughing. Why do I feel a bit guilty laughing though? I know he's just trying to make a living and all, but come on! Tetris lessons? Drunk Tetris lessons? For at least US 30? You tell me.
A better way to spend your money: